Cloudy Days + Sunshine = ME

This winter we've had many cloudy and rainy days. It's actually been really out of the ordinary... thunderstorms and tornadoes with sunshiny days all mixed together! This winter weather can get a person feeling a bit out of sorts.
Life for me has also been a little out of sorts. I've suffered from a WIDE variety of emotions all kinda tangled up and thrown around the room! I became a stay-at-home mom. My strongest emotion is gratitude. I am so, very, extremely grateful to be able to stay home and raise my daughter without career distractions lurking in my mind. I just don't think I could juggle career and mom-hood without slacking in one area! So, because of that, I'm grateful for being 100% with Mikaela.
Another emotion is love. I'm in love. I have two amazing people to love on! How fun is that! Yet, mixed with gratitude and love is sadness. My new role of being Mikaela's mommy has brought back MANY memories and "what if" thoughts of my own mom. What would life be like if my mom were alive, healthy and among us? How would she treat Mikaela? How would Mikaela respond to her? Would she always be around or would she be distant? Would she enjoy teaching me all the little tricks she learned along the road? How would our relationship change? And then I begin to think of ALL the things "she'll miss out on" and sadness really creeps in. If I let myself dwell on this I end up eating a LOT of chocolate... so, I desperately try to move on to emotion #3... hope.
Because of my relationship with Jesus I can cling onto hope without hesitation. My hope rests in Jesus to love us, take care of us, teach us, change us, mold us into His image. We are never alone. He is our Savior, our King! He offers limitless hope!
Then I move onto emotion #4... being overwhelmed. There's a lot to think about and prepare for in beginning to raise kiddos. I have learned sooo much already, yet I still have sooo much to learn! I'm trying really hard to master the role of wife and mother, yet I seem to fall short in either time, energy, or knowledge. So much to learn! So little time! I guess I should wrap up this post... and start on something a little more important... like laundry :)